Escapism In RPGs: The Good, The Bad, And The Balance

"Through all the highs and lows, I've never known someone so ferociously fabulous as you."- The Sorcerer

Oxford Dictionary defines escapism as: "The tendency to seek distraction and relief from unpleasant realities, especially by seeking entertainment or engaging in fantasy." TTRPGs, video games, and even books are common forms of escapism that can bring us solace and a sense of security as we step away from life. Tabletop games can be inspiring, build social connections, and relieve stress. However, this form of escapism can also be addictive and potentially harmful. So how do we find the balance, and what types of escape do TTRPGs bring? 

Benefits Of Escapism in TTRPGs 

"Find your freedom, but don't eff it up for everyone else." -The Paladin

Finding Inspiration

Creativity is a crucial pillar of playing role-playing games. Escaping from reality can help expand your mind and allow you to discover innovative ideas in a natural and fun environment. It was through Dungeons and Dragons that I found my voice as a storyteller and discovered a future as a fantasy writer. 

Being Your Best Self

Many people create their first characters as an idealized of themselves, which I find to be a beautiful concept. One of my long-time players started with a Tabaxi Paladin who went through struggles of faith, battled his inner demons, and eventually uncovered his self-worth that need not be defined by the approval of others. While in our story, the 'others' are fictional Gods, the story we told translated into his real life as he found purpose and drive to define life on his own terms. 

Building Real Connections

Like any good Shōnen anime, teamwork and friendship are at the core of what makes tabletop role-playing games such a wonderful place for building connections and exploring self-expression. So long as you practice good safety tools alongside empathy for your other players, the shared story you tell together can bring you closer together like nothing else. For example, I fell in love with a Satyr Artificer and moved states to be with her a year later. 

Stress Relief

Finally, the escape that we can find in RPGs can be just as stress relieving as a good massage or short vacation. In some ways, it can eclipse other relaxing activities in scope and efficiency. In a single four-hour session, you can get social interaction, an escape from the harshness or reality, flirt with your best friends, and receive the cathartic release of beheading some big-ass demon. Even outside the game, I have found some peace in things such as character-building and map-making. At the end of the day, it is a game, and like any good sport or board game, playing D&D is meant to relax you and recharge your batteries. 

Drawbacks Of Escapism In TTRPGs

"You teeter on the precipice of becoming a hero or villain and need to find the harmony between what's right." -The Druid

It Can Be Addictive

Addiction is when you become physically and mentally dependent on a particular substance or experience, and without it, you cannot live your everyday life without incurring adverse effects. Unfortunately, as humans, our brains are wired to seek the dopamine rush of things that make us happy, and it need not be substances like nicotine or alcohol we can become addicted to. Therefore, just like any other experience, take breaks and have a wide range of things that bring you joy rather than running away from life and seeking constant solace in the world you have built at the tabletop. 

Escapism Can Quickly Become Procrastination

This is the drawback of fantasy escapism that I have suffered from the most in life. Rather than writing articles for my job, there have been days when I simply drew maps and created NPCs. Even when not playing, there are times when the game can rule my mind, and daydreaming about what my character will do has consumed dozens of hours of my life at a time. If you notice that your priorities are shifting and escapism is hiding the essential aspects of life from your sight, it may be time to take a step back, plan your escapism sessions, and learn to embrace your life from all angles. 

Breakdown Of Real Connections

The dark mirror of making positive connections at the tabletop, escapism can lead to neglect of our true-to-life relationships. Have you ever been playing a game and received a call only to silence it and forget to call the person back? That exact scenario has happened to me on more than one occasion, and escaping from reality has led to some very real disconnections between me and those I hold dearly. While it is an escape, playing TTRPGs can't define your life, and some of the best people in your life may not be sitting across from you at the table. So don't neglect them and carve out time to go out for coffee or watch a movie together. (It's also an effective way to find new players to join your next session anyways) 

Finding The Balance

"What's right is subjective." -The Wizard

So if escapism is equal parts good and evil, how do we find the balance and turn it into something healthy?

Use Your Connections In And Out Of Game

My best friends are those who have sat at my table in the past. However, we do more than simply play pretend together. Further, some people I hold close to my heart have never even rolled a 20-sided die. D&D isn't the only thing we need to connect. Developing those genuine relationships in and out of the game is how we have bonded and discovered a mutual love for one another.

Know What You Are Escaping From

A history of abuse, healing from years of trauma, suffering from anxiety, and lack of control in a chaotic world. That is what I am escaping from when I play TTRPGs. So, ask yourself, what is it you are trying to take a break from, and how will you face it once the session is over? Escapism is a great way to find relief, but one day, you must meet your demons and overcome the dark shadow that forces you to run into fantasy. Life is tough for everyone, and you're not alone. We are all in this together, so lean on your party for when the hard times come and work to improve your reality. 

Love Yourself 

"Kindness is a free action." -The DM

I've found it nearly impossible to love others without loving myself. You deserve love, no matter what you have done or what others have done to you. You may not be your best self yet, but you can be, and following your heart is the first step in the journey of self-love.

"The fleeting friendships we find in fantasy are a radical reconstruction of some rumpus rhapsody." - The Bard